Saturday Night Craigslist “Free” listings are endlessly entertaining.

Ongoing List of Dudes I “Just Can’t” With:

  • Those kids who were like really lame in high school who would say shit really loud and obnoxiously just to be disruptive who are like 35 and go to the fucking bar where everyone is trying to watch some fucking Breaking Bad and continue to be loud obnoxious dbags because I guess daddy didn’t love them enough and their 35 year old said crusty ass and crusty ass band mates need all the attention they can get.

That Time I Met Lily from HeyLaBodega


So this post was supposed to be written on Sunday after I had the booziest brunch on record with the lovely Lily, but clearly I suck so now you have to read it days later. 

Lily is just a ray of beautiful wavy haired, hazely-green eyed sunshine. We got some little frenchy brunch trays and unlimited mimosas and became just the cutest friends. We discussed all sorts of things like my weird recurring boob zit and having curly hair, and online dating. Dear lord, online dating.

She’s just a great writer and should be nominated for human of the year, or at least the summer. Go follow her, dudes.

*photo sneakily creeped off of her facebook

Hint: Banter is the name of the bar. 


Have you spotted our ads on the subway? Were you fooled?

The sass.

I’m having the best “Good Friday” ever. I had a pretty Grand Thursday too. No work, trying a new restaurant in Williamsburg, finally getting caught up on laundry, and enjoying the warm weather. This is happiness, guys.

Around the Neighborhood: Dough Doughnuts, Clinton Hill.


The moment I moved to Clinton Hill in Brooklyn, everyone was telling me about the great things to do right down the street. That’s part of the charm of Brooklyn, you are in walking distance from great little shops and eateries all the time.

Well the first place that anyone mentioned was Dough Doughnuts. They raved to me about it! “It’s Zagat rated!!!” I didn’t even know what Zagat was, but I’m now absolutely certain it’s a high honor.

Dough makes fresh donuts, EVERY SINGLE DAY. Probably starting at 4 a.m. through close at 7p.m. They have new unique flavors that are rarely associated with donuts. Just look:

The space is small, with only 2-4 seats, so it’s kind of a grab and go establishment. But it’s really the industrial/warehouse/open feeling that makes the place. There is definitely an experience that it provides that screams “YOU’RE IN BROOKLYN OKAY. WE’RE TOO HIP TO FUNCTION.”

I bought the Dulce De Leche for my friend, Brittany, and I got the Cinnamon Sugar one for myself! The donuts are huge, even for my big mouth, and one is more than enough.

So now that I’ve past on my raving, it’s safe to say that I totally recommend this place and if you end up in Brooklyn, you must make an effort to stop in!

Why I Love Taking the Subway


When I first moved to New York (two weeks ago…), I honestly thought I was allergic to the Subway. The moment I was below ground my allergies were alerted and I’d sneeze repeatedly and gross people out.

Now that I’m all acclimated, I still go just short of anaphylactic shock, but I realized that I truly love the Subway!

I like how you have to grip onto grimey poles when there are no seats. Sometimes you can see the fingerprints from the nasty person who touched it before you! With how much hand sanitizer I’ve burned through, surely the economy has been stimulated!

I especially like when the subway jolts unexpectedly and I fall with my hand on or near someone’s crotch! I keep forgetting that my transportation choice is essentially a tin can being kicked down a dirty alley-way.

Have you ever played “everyone’s body is made of molten lava?” No? Well it’s this great game where you have to be extremely careful not to touch one of the 300 people shoved into your section of the train. It’s necessary to make a big deal if someone brushes against you because THEY’RE LAVA! Act like the lava has thumbs and is trying to pick pocket you when they inevitably bump you.

And let’s not forget how Charlie Brown’s teachers are letting you know what stop is next (except Hoyt-Schermerhorn, which just sounds like Charlie Brown’s teacher). I didn’t know every stop was called aejfoaifjaopdkvajd, but you learn something new everyday!

But really, it’s not so bad. I miss my car, but this is cheap and adventurous, and dangerous, and so NYC.